so i got sick

Y’all have no idea how annoyed I was at my inability to instill in myself enough stubbornness to write a blog post when I said I was going to. I was originally going to post on November 6, because, well, midterm elections. But, my body decided to get sick so here I am a day late. Still sick by the way.

SO let’s start with basic recap on my experiences with voting for the first time ever. It was a lot more research than I anticipated, and there was a lot of names I didn’t recognize which was not that surprising. I’m an independent so I voted entirely based on whichever candidate I felt like would do the best in that specific position. I’ve voted for Republicans and Democrats simply because compared to the others, that person seemed like a better choice. Don’t ask me who I voted for specifically because I can’t remember at the moment. I’m definitely excited to vote again.

What else did I have to say?

I haven’t started my December Dress yet, which I should.

I got sick like four days ago and I’m still not recovered as I’m writing this. Some kind of viral infection in my throat (the doc didn’t specify which kind of viral infection, which confused me but its not strep throat so that’s a relief). I’ve been hopped up on ibuprofen and water.

Things are great with the boyfriend, which is awesome, dunno if I’ve mentioned that we’ve made up.

It’s the holiday season which means Christmas songs can be played all the time without getting funny looks.

So yeah. Good times.

xox celestie

 

idk what to title this lol

DISCLAIMER THESE ARE ALL OPINIONS NO ONE IS FORCING ANYONE TO ACCEPT WHAT IM SAYING LOL

Someone recently (today haha) asked me about couple compatibility. And, for me, it all comes down to similar core values.

Core values as in the same or similar beliefs in regards to different virtues and vices (I totally borrowed these words from my ethics class). Virtues like honesty, compassion, and pride (there are others lol). Vices like killing, lying, and greed. There are spectrums to these things and I think we all have an opinion/belief on them. So when these core values coincide with another person is when I think compatibility exists between people, it doesn’t always have to be couples, it can be friends too.

I don’t think that having exactly the same interests is as important compared this. Like yes, you can bond over having the same favorite artists or the same show, but it’s not as important. The saying “opposites attract,” is not true in terms of core values.

To give an example, my sister and I have been opposites from since we were very young, we have different interests, different styles, different favorites, different personalities-opposites almost. But the one thing that we are the same in, is our core beliefs-we both value the same things in people and in ourselves: compassion and consideration for others, generosity because we are privileged, all these things. And, one might say that of course we have similar values, we were raised together by the same parents-but my other sister differs completely from us in terms of values. I’m not saying she doesn’t value the same things, but she puts more importance on other things.

But I was also asked what a couple should do if they find themselves incompatible by my defintion. And to what extent? What lines shouldn’t be crossed?

I personally don’t believe that a couple would be together if they were completely incompatible. I think that something must have drawn them together in the first place aside from physical appearance. BUT on the off chance that it does happen, I would say that (as a true romantic would) that if they loved each other enough and they were willing to fight for each other enough, then they should be able to get through it. And, I’m not saying that they should pretend like their differences don’t exist and ignore the problem entirely. But, I think that if they were willing to put in the effort to stay together, then they should focus that effort into understanding the other person’s point of view to gain some clarity.

But, the thing is with this is that, relationships will never be easy-even amongst compatible couples.

But there are lines that shouldn’t be crossed y’know?

To give an example (no this did not happen to me LOL):

An ‘incompatible’ couple with differing views on let’s say killing. Person 1 believes that it’s okay to kill others in defense of family and friends. Person 2 completely disagrees and believes that you should never ever kill anyone no matter the circumstances. Person 1 also believes that lying is unacceptable, that you should always be honest with yourself and others. Person 2 thinks that there are exceptions to this. They both accept that the other has different beliefs from themselves, but they choose to ignore it, they don’t talk about it because its a ‘touchy’ subject. They pretend this problem doesn’t exist-and thats’s not healthy. It’s borderline toxic even, at least in my opinion because I made this basic scenario up.

OR

If person 2 was completely blinded by his/her love (infatuation?) for person 1, that they were ignorant to a difference in values, then I would also consider that to be toxic.

But, what I’m trying to say is that I feel the line is crossed when the relationship becomes toxic. Toxic is subjective, it is different for every relationship so I won’t label something definitively as being toxic. But, I definitely feel like this is one of those things where you have to let your friends in and have them keep you in check. At least, that’s what I do and I make sure they know I appreciate them and what they have to say even if I don’t agree.

thanks for reading this lol

relationships are my soapbox if you longtime readers haven’t noticed yet.

xox celestie

 

human experience

(this was my speech for a class)(also I was super proud of it in written form despite the disjointedness of it)

 

“We were the people who were not in the papers. We lived in the blank white spaces at the edges of print. It gave us more freedom. We lived in the gaps between the stories.”

-Margaret Atwood, “A Handmaid’s Tale”

Today, I’m going to talk about the time I journeyed through modern literature to find self-insight.

This was an experience that was a complex mix of emotion, inspiration, and enlightenment.

Years ago, some weekend in the fall, and I know for sure it was fall because reds, oranges and browns litter my memory of this event.

On the way home from visiting one of my uncles, my family and I stopped at a bookstore.

I remember this trip was different from ones in the past because I had decided that instead of getting books by well-known authors of just the mystery genre, I would try something new and get something from each genre, and of authors I did not know.

After finishing a lot of the books that same day, I was thinking over a lot of the things I had read and I felt enlightened and emotionally charged.

Each author despite different genres talk about abstract concepts, like life, death, all these things. But, each were able to describe the beauty in the collective human experience.

What it means to be human, to feel, and to experience the world around us. I could hear the authors’ voices swirling around in my head. Each with a different perspective and view on the world, it was explosive.

It was emotional in that you could feel pain, happiness, rage, elation, and all these emotions through the characters the authors had crafted and it was beautiful.

I had always loved reading but because of this experience, I was better able to understand the circumstances of the world around me and gain a tolerance for situations I might not know enough to judge.

This experience was a journey in and of itself, a journey of really self-insight and discovery.

I think that stories and novels, if written well, can really broaden one’s view of the world around us.

Happy National Read-A-Book Day.

POWER

Hey guys!

[storytime] So on Monday, I was driving to get lunch and there was this highway patrol car in front of me and it was a red light so I stopped behind this car. The light was taking a while since there was a lot of traffic (it was lunchtime) and the patrol car ran the red light. Now, I know that there are exceptions to traffic laws for police and law enforcement when there’s an emergency; but, there was no visible reason-from what I could see- to run the light other than impatience. There was no one speeding because of the high traffic, no car crash, no fire, etc. So, it was a really mind-boggling experience.

Now, I don’t know if it was legal of the person to run that light. I don’t know traffic laws in regards to law enforcement but, it didn’t seem that legal to me. Does anyone know?

So that story was a precursor to the main topic of this post.

Abraham Lincoln once said, “Nearly all men can withstand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s character, give him power.”

We all know that once given power, people change. Some become arrogant. Some make rash decisions. It’s in our nature. I am a huge bibliophile, I love books, I love stories. I love reading about people. An author is good when they are able to fully capture the vulnerability and rawness of being human. A lot of books I read are in the fantasy/mystery genres and its in those books where I’ve learned half of what I know about people. People who are given any kind of power often misuse it-that’s a fact (misuse is subjective I agree). But, the actions they take, are often not ‘good.’

Power corrupts, but how it corrupts is different for everybody. Someone who is in law enforcement-they are given power to make sure that the law is obeyed. This given power has them believing they are the law-and that’s corruption of their character. But this is a generalized example, obviously there are exceptions. Not everyone realizes their own power, and some who do-they realize the danger and their potential. Fame and influence is a power, some don’t realize the potential of that and those that do, they recognize the potential profit and future success that is possible or they choose to use that influence to help others. Any young person in this day and age will recognize the power of media and technology. It’s all about perspective-how you see the world.

(I had this whole post planned but it all went out of the window as soon as I started typing-I get lost in my own head sometimes.)

DAY4

Hey guys! it’s officially day 4 of my a-post-a-day challenge!

So, today’s topic is body image and my advice for loving your body no matter what.

Let’s paint a picture.

Imagine a Taiwanese and Vietnamese mix, 4’11 girl.

She has short hair a little past her shoulders and wears glasses too big for her baby face (but that’s how she likes it).

She’s got so-called ‘small bones,’ with a 23 ½ inch waist, 31 ½ inch hips, and 31 inch bust.

She’s got an arch in her foot because she wore heels at too young an age and that arch is not natural but she looks like she has dancers’ feet now.

She has no thigh gap, she’s got hip dips and belly rolls (just like everybody else) and jiggly upper arms.

I’ve always been told that I was short and much too skinny.

People would always ask me if I was anorexic or bulimic-but I swear I’m not.

My sister calls me fat all the time (not in a malicious way-she just means I have to get up from the couch and go exercise).

I’ve never felt uncomfortable with how I look because I’m confident in myself and that while appearances are important-its how I present myself to others that detract from how I look and put more emphasis on my personality.

I’ve been ‘skinny-shamed,’ and I’ve been called ‘vertically challenged,’ but I’ve never really cared because I’m content with the way I am. You know, its easy to overlook these comments if you’re truly confident in yourself. I make jokes about my height all the time-its easier to win hide and seek by the way.

You can learn to love yourself by: standing in front of a mirror and just say one positive thing about yourself every day; wear the right clothes, ones that make you feel ready to take on the world (I didn’t win best dressed senior by wearing sweats every day ya know); focus on being a good person to those around you-your friends can build up your confidence better than you can alone; there’s plenty of other ways other bloggers have discovered that I haven’t thought of.

The plus-size community is a pretty powerful group of people sharing self-love and image positivity. The reason that this group in particular is so successful, is because they have icons and activists who are confident in themselves and their identity and their fans share that confidence (because we all want to imitate our idols).

If you don’t feel comfortable with the way you are now-then change to be better. If you don’t love your rolls or your love handles, exercise and work for the body you want. It’s all about mindset, you have to believe that you can do it-because in the end if its something that you really want, then you just do it. You can complain and whine as much as you want-as long as you get the job done. There are a lot of people who wallow in self-pity because they’re not happy with the way they are-and what I say to them is this:

“Don’t hate on society for shaming you when you shame yourself. It’s a different story if you accept and love yourself just the way you are. But if you wish that you had the body of a model from that magazine you like, if you wish to look different from the way you are now-then you have to change your attitude. Work hard to obtain the changes you want-because there will always be body-shamers out there and it’s easy to blame them. Don’t take the easy way out.”

I’m not saying its easy. I’m not saying that it’ll be instant results. I’m not saying that you should change to conform to society’s expectations of beautiful (because that is always changing)-but if its your own personal goal-if the reason you want to change is to better yourself-then you have to work hard.